


i was here

by buckybear (antoniohiggins)



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant, Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Fluff and Angst, Loss of Parent(s), No Dialogue, Parent Tony Stark, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Post-Spider-Man: Homecoming, Pre-Spider-Man: Homecoming, Tony Feels, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony Stark is Good With Kids, Tony Stark-centric, hella iron dad, tony loves peter so much ok
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-22
Updated: 2018-09-22
Packaged: 2019-07-15 16:00:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,316
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16066511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/antoniohiggins/pseuds/buckybear
Summary: tony feels guilty for all the times he wasn't there for peteralternatively, he doesn't see the value in all the times he was





	i was here

**Author's Note:**

> this is only my second marvel work so please be nice! constructive criticism would be amazing though! enjoy!
> 
> (also the title is from the song 'i was here' by beyonce)

Tony wasn’t there when Peter was born.

He didn’t see him open his eyes for the first time, he wasn’t there for his first words, or even his first steps.

He didn’t marry Peter’s mother, in fact, he never even met her. He didn’t spend weeks preparing a nursery, he didn’t go to weekly classes for months to prepare for childcare.

He never bought a stroller or a crib or a little wardrobe of tiny clothes.

He never learned how to prepare a bottle of formula, he never learned how to change a diaper, or burp a baby.

He never took Peter to the park, he never taught him how to play catch, or tie his shoes.

He never dropped him off at school for the first time, he never got to teach him to ride a bike or make his first baking soda volcano.

He wasn’t the one that took him to see his first Star Wars movie, he wasn’t the one that bought him his first Iron Man action figure, and sadly he wasn’t the man that was there for him when his parents never came home from work.

He wasn’t the one that took him to therapy for the first time. He wasn’t the one that taught him how to tie a tie for the funeral. He wasn’t the one that worked double and sometimes triple shifts at work so that Peter could afford to go to a school with kids who were _almost_ as smart as he was.

But Tony also wasn’t the man that left him home alone most nights of the week. He wasn’t the one so caught up in working that he forgot that when your son can’t afford to go out with his friends, he might get lonely. He wasn’t the one that accidentally forgot the anniversary of that fateful plane crash and left Peter home alone to genuinely believe he’d just lost the two people who said they weren’t going anywhere. It was all in good intentions and a complete accident, but Tony felt his heart shatter when Peter told him about his first panic attack that night.

Because Tony wasn’t there for Peter during the hardest parts of his life. He wasn’t there for the first moments or the classic milestones.

No, Tony was the for the last. He was the one tasked with holding Peter Parker in his arms during his _last_ moments.

You see, Tony wasn’t his father. He wasn’t Peter’s father, he didn’t raise him, he _definitely_ didn’t help conceive him, and in his mind, he wasn’t there for him when it mattered.

But to Peter, he was. To Peter, Tong was there when he needed him most. When he needed someone like Tony in his life, he was there, ready, willing, and able.

And so Tony was the one who gave him his first real computer. Tony was the one who made sure his shoes never had holes,his stomach was never empty, and his shelves were always stocked with LEGO sets. Tony made sure his aunt could still afford to spend time with her nephew. Tony made sure Peter could still go out with his friends on a Friday night like any normal kid.

Yet, Tony was also there for the spider bite. He was there to stabilize him as Peter struggled to get back on his feet. He took his web shooter designs and he made sure they would last as long as Peter wanted to keep using them. He made sure that there was more than just a cotton hoodie between the then-fourteen-year-old teenager and a fall to his death.

He kept him safe. If nothing else mattered, at least he made sure he was safe. That was enough for May Parker, at least.

No superhero to ever defend the streets of New York had ever been as carefully protected as Spiderman. All thanks to Tony.

He’s the one that took Peter Parker on his very first vacation. Sure, it turned out a little differently than they had originally planned, but Tony had never seen a smile so big when they returned to their hotel the night after the airport battle. Tony was the one that spent all that time worrying about one of his ex-friends hurting the kid and yet the kid was ecstatic.

Tony Stark was the man who gave him access to his personal workshop, instantly changing the life of a fifteen-year-old nerd with the greatest _real_ internship in the country. He was the one who gave Peter the means to flex his muscles, both mental _and_ physical.

He was the one that put together a folder full of college recommendation letters just in case something happened to him so that, even if he couldn’t tell them himself, the world would still know that he knew the smartest kid in the country with a brain nearly as big as his heart. Tony was the one that signed the papers on Peter’s sixteenth birthday for him to take ownership of Stark Industries once Tony was long gone and Pepper eventually retired, not to the boy’s knowledge, of course.

No, Tony Stark wasn’t Peter’s father.

But he was his dad.

He wasn’t related to him. He didn’t put together his crib, or teach him how to love the city around him, or teach him to memorize the periodic table. He wasn’t there to help Peter with his homework back when he still couldn’t grasp how Spanish could possibly even be learned. He wasn’t there when Peter didn’t understand why bright lights and loud noises made his head hurt and his ears ring after the spider bite. He wasn’t there to teach him what to do with his first crush, he wasn’t there to show him how to navigate the subway by himself for the first time, but he was there when it mattered to Peter.

He was there when Peter was swinging through Queens in glorified pajamas. He was there when Peter’s only hope of going to college one day was slaving away over homework and studying for the chance that he might get a full ride somewhere. He was there when May couldn’t handle her first anniversary without her husband. He was there when she got hung up at work and couldn’t pick Peter up from school. He was there when Peter was itching to test a new idea he had for whatever new Stark tech Tony was working on.

He was there when Peter and May only had each other.

He was there when they didn’t want to admit that sometimes just each other wasn’t enough.

He was there when Peter needed a new emergency contact at school.

He was there when Peter had his bad days and he was ready with anything that could possibly help.

He was there when Peter snuck off his school bus to come help in a fight he _knew_ Tony would be a part of.

He was there when Peter fell from the sky, ready with a suit to catch him like always.

He was there when Peter had some crazy spaceman pointing a gun at his head.

He was there when that mad Titan grabbed him by the neck and slammed him into the unforgiving ground.

He was there when they were seconds away from stealing the gauntlet and saving the universe.

And he was there when everything fell apart.

He was there when Peter called out his name and looked him in the eyes like he needed his dad to take care of him.

He was there to catch him as Peter begged for Tony to help.

He was there to hold his kid in his arms as he cried and pleaded and then disappeared before Tony could even comprehend what had just happened.

Tony was there alone when Peter needed him.

_Tony was there._

_But Peter wasn’t._

**Author's Note:**

> thanks so much for reading!! kudos and comments make my day and i'm always open to prompts and requests!


End file.
